Yu-Shan Wu

on November 30, 2015

Yu-Shan Wu is Foreign Policy Researcher at the South African Institute of International Affairs (SAIIA). She has a Masters Degree in International Relations from the University of the Witwatersrand. She also has a background in media studies and has worked at the South African Broadcasting Corporation and contributed to a project on Chinese presence in South Africa for the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation. Before joining SAIIA in 2012, she worked as a research and events assistant for SAIIA’s China in Africa Project.

Life After Death | 11

on November 30, 2015

“I am thinking of remarrying because I have no other choice. My elderly father-in-law, already 79, has been in poorer and poorer health. I can’t manage looking after him myself. I am also not in good health myself, and we need to have an income-earner. My son is still in school and is not married yet; we’ll need to prepare a house for him so that he can get a wife. I have no other choice…

“If I was 50, I wouldn’t look for a new husband. I would just look after Jinbo’s children… But I’m not 50…

Life After Death | 10

on November 30, 2015

“When he was alive, he always asked me to find someone else who could be good to me after his death… There are more than 10 men who have expressed interest in me, chatting with me online or coming to the house to visit.

“I’m considering one. But first I want him to go for a medical checkup to be sure he doesn’t have silicosis. Even if it’s very mild silicosis, I won’t accept it. Otherwise I will go mad.”

—Mi Shixiu

Life After Death | 9

on November 30, 2015

“When he died, we couldn’t find enough able-bodied men in our courtyard and neighborhood to carry his coffin uphill. We needed 30 men. Because all the men in our courtyard are either dead or ill from silicosis, we hired men from outside; we paid them each with a 50-renminbi red packet, two packs of cigarettes, and a pair of Liberation brand shoes.”

—Mi Shixiu

Life After Death | 8

on November 30, 2015

“I was so reliant on him. I didn’t have to use my mind for anything. Now I have to, and I find that actually I can handle a lot of things. Previously I’d ask him everything, even when I’d go to the market, he’d plan everything nicely for me, what to buy, how much to spend. Now, even if I can’t cope, I simply have to.

“He kept telling me when he was alive: when I’m not here anymore just imagine that I’ve gone away to earn money for our family.

“But how could I? It’s different. If he had just gone away to work, we’d have something to look forward to…”

Life After Death | 7

on November 30, 2015

“It was so sudden. He looked well after coming back from the hospital. It was only four days after we got back. He ate a big bowl of rice for our regular lunch around 4 or 5 pm. It was a very hot day. He wanted to take a nap. He was not comfortable lying down so he sat up. He asked me to tie his usual blanket with a piece of string so that it could be used, bundled, as his backrest. I lay down for a nap too, my feet to his side. He tickled me and played with me. Then in resting, he suddenly sat up and then fell on his left side and I could not wake him up again.”

Life After Death | 6

on November 30, 2015

“There’s no relief in my father’s death, even though he had been sick for so long. There’s only a void. I used to be able to talk to him about everything. He used to solve problems for me…

“My father has just died. Of course I feel uncomfortable accepting another man in our family. If my mother insists on marrying that man, I will call him ‘uncle’ and never ‘dad.’

“It poured very heavily that night of my father’s wake. I think my dad didn’t go away well in death. He had a hard life right till the end.”

—He Jinbo, 20, son of He Quangui

Life After Death | 5

on November 30, 2015

“I haven’t thrown out that chair—his chair—and his cushion. And his medicines… It’s like I worry he might still want to take his medicines. As long as I don’t throw them out, it’s as if he’s still around…

“I burnt some of his X-rays during the prayers we did every seven days after his death—so that, with them, he can go get medical help in the other world.”

—Mi Shixiu

Life After Death | 4

on November 30, 2015

“In his final months, we always slept with a red light on. Now I sleep with either the big fluorescent light on, or the TV on. Otherwise, I can’t sleep at all. When [our son] Jinbo is home from school, we sleep together in the bed. He sleeps on the side where his father used to. I sleep on my usual side of the bed.

“Only twice I have felt scared, when Jinbo was not here. One time, I felt like He was quietly sleeping behind me. Another time, I felt that he was pressing the top of my head and shoulders.”

—Mi Shixiu

Life After Death | 3

on November 30, 2015

“I wonder if he knows that you are here today. I think you must feel very uncomfortable being here today. Usually when you come he’s here to talk to you, joke with you. He’s especially happy when you come to visit. He’s not here today. If he was talking to you now, for sure you’d be uncomfortable and your head would feel like it’s bursting...

“Previously, he said to me he wanted to reincarnate as my child, so that he could come back and repay me. I took such good care of him… I can say that without regret…